Explore Mars! - Mars Exploration Program - NASA

Howard: I got the Mars Rover stuck in a ditch.

Sheldon: Where?

Howard: On a dusty highway just outside Bakersfield. Where do you think? On Mars!

Woman (peering out of door): Howard, is everything okay?

Howard: Yeah, baby, I'll be right in.

Sheldon: You brought a girl to the Mars Rover control room?

Howard: Yeah, I picked her up in the bar. She's a doctor. One free barium enema and my mother won't care she's not Jewish.

Leonard: Wait a minute, so the eye patch and the insults worked?

Howard: No, there were three other guys with eye patches, It was a fiasco. What did work was, "How'd you like to visit a secret government facility?"

Sheldon: So what exactly do you want us to do?

Howard: I need you and Raj to help me get the Rover out of the ditch, and I need you to get Stephanie out before somebody notices she's here. She doesn't exactly have clearance.

Sheldon: Really? They don't let strange women from honky-tonks come in and play with $200million government projects on distant planets?

Howard: Yes, I was bad. Maybe she'll spank me. Can we please move on?

Girl: Hey, Howard, you know, it's getting late, so do I get to drive this thing or what?

Howard: Yeah. No. I'm sorry, but something's come up. Kind of a Mars Rover, Mars Rover, can Howard come over, situation. So my friend Leonard is gonna take you home.

Girl: Oh, okay. Let's go, friend Leonard.

Leonard: Okay.

Howard: I'll call ya.

Girl: Yeah. So are you a scientist like Howard?

Leonard: No one's a scientist like Howard.

Howard: My mother is so gonna love her.

Sheldon: Oh, how nice. Maybe they can carpool when they visit you in federal prison.

Series 2 Episode 08 – The Lizard-Spock Expansion