Bob's Red Mill

"Whole Grain Foods For Every Meal Of The Day."

Getting Your S**t F**ked Up

School: On A Scale Of 1 To 5, 1 Being The Worst And 5 Being The Best, How Do You Rate Your Post-Secondary School Education?
Student: It Was Awful, I Give It A Zero!
School: Then Why Did You Give Us $350,000?
Student: I don't Know!
School: Well, Try A Little Harder Next Time!

Office Dysfunction

Pepperoni Manufactures Getting Attacks From The Pizza Parlor Consortium For Selling Pepperoni In Grocery Markets.

The Top-Down Solution

Giving The People's Money To A Few Select Individuals Will Not Cure The Nation's Economic Problems.

Disproportionality

"The Loudest Get The Most Attention!"

On Looking Busy

To Those Watching The Nation's Borders, How About Watching Our Minds' Borders!

Leader Problems

Obama: "Aah, I'm Taking The Cake."
Everybody: "Heh, You're Taking The Cake!"

Obama: "I'll Bat The Ball And You Go Get It."
Everybody: "Heh, How About Giving Someone Else A Chance!"

Obama: "I'll Phone You And You Pick It Up."
Everybody: "Heh, I'm Not On Call 24/7!"

Global Warming

How Many Nuclear Explosions In The Ocean Does It Take To Raise The Ocean's Temperature 1° Fahrenheit?

The Self-Fulfilling Prophesy

"We Drive Him Crazy, He Commits A Crime, We Arrest Him, We Get Our Paychecks! Is That So Wrong?"

Perennials

The Spark That Lit The Terrorists' Flame

When Asking Why, He Was Told, "Beacause I Felt Like It!".

Casio Men's Moon Phase Tide Graph Sport Watch